Sunny Blue

Song: Sunny Blue

Album: Losing The Game

Artist: The Blend

Written by Toussaint Morrison

Released May 8, 2008

ref: 

Sunny Blue,

I know you’re trying hard to find the truth, but this looks to me more like you’re searching for an excuse. If this goes down like you plan it, tomorrow’s going to be the same canvas as today except the paint will lack passion.

Sunny Blue, I’m cool with not taking another step, but I do got a problem with you standing on that ledge. Being alive is painful, and right now death makes sense. Your heart’s strangled in the moment  pressed against what’s next.

I got the call from Annie, and ran ‘til my feet began draggin’, down 5^th and Hampton cos’ both of my bike tires are flattened – sprintin’ soon as I got the news, she told me what you had been planning, and I figured to talk before you make this happen. I heard about the news with your significant other. Some kids were talkin’ about you at this party last summer. I was shook, cos’ whenever I saw the two of you together, ya’ll looked like you would never let go, no matter the relationship’s weather… well, I just don’t know what to say, I mean forever and never both got their final hours and I’ve let go so many times I forgot how to wrap my arms around.

My bad, I kinda got carried away. I had the same situation as you with this girl I used to date. You know that feelin’ you be feelin’ when you get close with somebody, your sense of balance and solar system revolve around’em. This is bigger than that Sunny. I’m not gonna lie to you: for all I care you can jump off this bridge and hang up your pumas, be the headline story on all of the local news fronts, and for the next two months be the fact, fiction and rumor. I’ve concluded cryin’ the same tears and same tunes, and I did not sprint the long ends of eight city blocks to save you. Some are born with privilege and some aren’t, and I stay alive to fight for even grounds. So jump

If you’re gonna stand there and not do it, I’m just gonna sit here and keep talking, just tell me if I’m a nuisance. I’d hate to break your train of thought deciding if to jump, or step down and walk away to contemplate a second run, ‘cos this isn’t a one-time thing, your life isn’t an episode, but if standin’ there helps you check yourself like a stethoscope, then so be it, but you’re searching to look admirable where not giving a fuck has become fashionable. The people that you want to care… don’t, and if you do this they’ll forget it like last year’s TRL host. Your self-esteem’s too dependent on your cell phone. Plus you cling to the past like bad Velcro. That’s natural Sunny, your situation’s not special. You’re tryin’ to hide it, but I can see you smiling half-way sarcastic ‘cos you don’t know what the hell you’re doing, and slightly crying ‘cos you know I’d jump with you.

Sunny Blue, I gotta go soon. The dawn is calling, the sky’s getting bright and my eyelids keep falling. Morning traffic will turn your privacy to public and you won’t feel the same with so many people watching. I care about you, and that’s the plain and simple truth, even if it makes me look sensitive and vulnerable. Sunny Blue, fuck the whole world for all it’s not worth. I’d sacrifice my prided life to make your memories not hurt. Past the point what you feel, you can’t touch or physically handle, so you carve it in your skin to make the pain tangible. Couldn’t ignore long the swollen stripes in your forearms, rockin’ long sleeves in the summer whistlin’ your song. Any more harm, I heard you would’ve cut through muscle, but this isn’t about that, or any of your other personal struggles. This is a friend saying whatever choice you make, you’ll still be loved, but… I can’t relate.

And before I go. Annie told me to tell you she loves you more than you’ll ever know. I told her that’s not enough, ‘cos you’re still standin’ here, quietly crying on the inside of your mind rationalizing death against how fucked up life is. I paused at the door, turned around and looked her right in her iris, and said I understand why she wouldn’t want to see something like this, but that if you jumped… I’d wanna be there before you do it.

To let you know life is worthwhile when there’s at least one person in the world that loves you more than the word defines it. That’s how I feel. I gotta go.